Living On Purpose | Do You Have The Guts
Have you heard people talking about owning the day and thought that’s a luxury for others - not for me? I’m offering a new story today - one that says that is not true. Getting what you want to get done instead of the world around you running you in circles is possible - and even if you start small, it still feels GREAT.
Living on purpose is all about owning the day vs the day owning you.
Let’s get down to why knowing your priorities in 3 categories of life and WHY having daily routines or rituals matter. Spoiler alert…once you get going with this, it amplifies your time. Sounds crazy, but it’s true.
Drive The Day in Your Preferred Direction
This episode is the foundation for owning the day and driving it in the direction you are steering to accomplish tasks that are important to you. Yes, a LOT of our time is held captive by work and responsibilities. Not all though. If we know what’s our priorities and what is most important to us, we can carve out half an hour to one hour to move the needle forward on life to-do’sthat matter.
In this episode of Do You Have The Guts, we are going to break it all down and figure out how to get started.
I call this idea of living on purpose several different things.
Owning the day
Creating the day
Living with intention
Living on purpose
We will talk about how, what to do when your plan is interrupted and how this way of living allows us to find that joy in the journey we hear about all the time. It’s not about the destination, but the journey… right? The way to find joy in the journey is celebrating the smallest of wins, and those are so much easier to find when we are living with intention and working from a checklist of what is important to us as we grow in this life.
Intentional Living vs Reactionary Living
In scenario 1 the someone wakes up late, hits snooze a few times, eventually scrambles to get ready for the day and literally flies out the door. Maybe they pass go with a cup of coffee and maybe not. They might leave the house with no nutrition, no hydration and no idea what’s coming at them when they do make it to their destination which could be work, school, or an appointment of some kind.
On the way this person is late and chanting a mantra of “I’m late! I’m late! I’m late! C’mon Cmon…chanting at traffic lights and urging other drivers to get out of the way and hurry! The entire drive to the destination they are wishing time would move faster.
Finally they arrive. They take a seat and open up an app on their phone. Maybe it’s email or a social media account of some sort…(by the way, even if they skipped the traffic journey and plopped into a desk chair in a home office, what’s next still applies.) The app is opened and a random message the person finds whole heartedly offensive finds them before they’ve even thought about what’s important to you for the day…And in that moment of reading the offensive wording, their brain and their thinking are hijacked.
They are held captive by thoughts about WHATEVER that message was about, their opinions of it, others’ thoughts and comments…they might fire off a saucy response, rabbit hole into what other people are posting, or simply feel downright bad.
Their body most likely reacts to what they are thinking and they begin feeling unhelpful emotions like outrage, possibly anger, disgust, or general dissent. They might feel physical symptoms like anxiety, upset stomach, or the thrum of anger bursting through their system.
They might react to this by seeking comfort from food or a morning cocktail of sugar + a little coffee…or maybe a coke
Total Reaction
45 minutes to an hour into their day they’ve reacted to almost everything - waking up late, what other people are saying or doing,and the day proceeds in much the same way with little nutrition imbibed, little true hydration, breathing becomes shorter, anxiety rises…whew!
My question is, was there a decision made in any of this? In this example, did the person decide they’d waste their morning away or did it happen without the person noticing? I know that to so many people, this reaction mode is normal.
What if there had been a decision ? Let’s look at scenario 2.
What if this person decided to get up early, take time to hydrate and prepare for the day. What if that morning included just a few pages of reading something inspiring or uplifting? Or listening to upbeat /inspiring music?
What if 16 oz of water was gulped before a cup of coffee (according to Shawn Stevenson in Eat Smarter, this is like giving your ‘insides a bath’ first thing in the morning).
What if in between that water and coffee the person took in 3-5 REALLY deep belly breaths, thought of 5 things to be grateful for that day and opened a planner to decide what 3 tasks were most important to them for the day.
As they hop in the car, they pop in a favorite podcast bc that was their thing. As they arrive at work, they take 10 minutes to organize the day, look at their calendar and they now know what to expect because they are a little early and have time to do this.
What if they had a time set for checking and responding to email or opening that first indulgent app of the day…
Because they don’t sit down and first give their attention to what others want them to do or think for the day, they remain in control of their thoughts and emotions. They even remain in control of their time as they prep for the day. Even if the day blows up or is invaded with unanticipated issues or meetings, they are ahead of the curve and ready to implement a plan to reorganize what’s important.
What if there’s an end of day ritual that allows shutting down email & office time, knowing what’s next for the evening and week ahead because they’ve planned it…at least to a degree.
This is living with intention, or living on purpose.
Reacting to what plops into your morning and sets the tone for your thoughts, feelings and emotions creates an unknown and uncontrolable outcome.
Beginning the day on your terms and taking time to choose a few thoughts also sets the tone for feelings and emotions throughout the whole day. This scenario creates a much more intentional result.
We will talk later about interruptions and unknowns creeping in, but with a strong foundation in the morning, the day’s outcome is much more intentional than reactionary. And results are empowering.
Doing what you want to do or shifting your aim on purpose vs allowing your environment to dictate your progress each day is transformative! This is a great step to take in becoming who you want to be, and who you are meant to be.
Knowing Our Priorities
I just described two scenarios and the biggest difference was the action of deciding how the day would begin and flow. From getting up to getting enough sleep to pouring in good nutrition to thinking 5 grateful thoughts in the morning - it’s all a simple decision. Maybe not always easy, but the choice or the decision as to how the day will begin is ours. However, if we don’t know what’s important to us, or we do not know our priorities then the decision on how to spend or use our time is difficult. There is so much stuff vying for our attention and our attention is easy to give - if we don’t know what matters most.
I invite you to define your priorities. Without knowing what is important to us, how can we effectively plan our time?
I’ve been scrambling through life recently and feeling like I’ve been running in circles and trying to ‘get things done’. And I realized I have all of this intention and I know what is important, but I haven’t planned a second of what time I can control during the day.
As I’ve begun this practice of living on purpose and planning my time, I’ve stacked the habit on top of my morning workout, morning journaling routine among other things that make my life work, I’m finding my time feels more expansive - like I’ve found an extra hour.
The truth is, I haven’t found anything! I am simply utilizing and being intentional with planning what I will do with my day because I know my priorities.
There are three categories of priority to hone in on.
What are your personal priorities?
What are your family priorities?
What are your professional priorities?
First, take time to figure out 3-5 really important tasks or ideas that you want to do or be better at in the next 6 months. Work to move the needle forward just a little bit on one of these items each and every day.
What are your family priorities? This is about being present with your kids or partner. This is separate from your personal desires. Maybe you need to find a way to get a solid dinner on the table and be present at dinner time with your family. Maybe you need to call your parents weekly. Maybe you need a regular date night. Define it so you can capture time for it.
What are your work priorities? Do you want to grow, advance, be a better leader, or get better at a certain skill? Plan a little time each day to think about what this looks like, feels like and imagine how it might come together. Visualization is a fantastic tool for envisioning your future and it’s something we will discuss in greater detail in a future episode.
Time Management
Once you know what you want personally, family wise and professionally, you can sit down with a calendar and plug it in. If you have a really busy schedule, you might plan out the week. If you’re a busy parent, you are likely already doing this with your kids’ schedules. What about your schedule though? Do you take time to plug you into your calendar at all? If not, this might be why life feels like such a reaction to everything happening.
It sounds SO SIMPLE and it is… it sounds so simple that it’s a step we think we can skip.
I’ve been skipping the plugging in priorities to time slots lately and I’ve felt LOST, and at a loss for time, and unproductive.
I am a person who loves routines and I’ve started to take time on Saturday to plug priorities into the week and then also look at what’s happening first thing every morning. When the day is full, this creates so. much. focus., and it delivers results that I want. The planning or managing my time removes that feeling of being busy and getting nothing done.
Anticipating Obstacles, Resistance, and my favorite new task - a ‘not to do’ list!
Let me tell you guys, I've RESISTED this time blocking, or planning the day for a while now. I’ve blamed it on my happy go lucky nature…my desire to go with the flow…
Let’s just review the definition of resistance. Resistance has two definitions and the first is the refusal to accept or comply with something, or the attempt to prevent something by action or argument. I’ve definitely been using these arguments to resist the obvious solution.
Plugging things into a time slot seemed like it would tie me down or trap my time, interrupt my flow, or cause me to fail. If I couldn’t get the task done, I’d fail. I hate that idea, but if you know me, you know I am a recovering perfectionist. I do not even realize when I’m avoiding failure half the time.
I came to my wits end though and I realized it was really about perspective, and planning, time blocking, or time management had to be the missing link.
Planning and executing early morning gym time has CHANGED MY LIFE, and I do not mess with that! Why wouldn’t planning time for my priorities during the day - specifically the afternoon hours - have the same effect?
Not only has time management allowed me to move needles forward and get things done, I feel accomplished. For me accomplished leads right to wins. Without that feeling of accomplishment, there are way fewer wins to celebrate! And less joy is found in the day…enjoying the day or celebrating these little wins of overcoming resistance and checking off important tasks is where finding joy in the journey comes from. Joy in the journey of life is missing when you don’t take time to appreciate the little things like writing the next blog, executing some killer content, or teaching a quick live lesson online like I wanted to do!
Now resistance is ALSO the ability not to be affected by something, especially adversely.
Anticipating the obstacle of planning my time has allowed me to resist the idea that it isn’t helpful. As I’ve begun resisting those thoughts and choosing thoughts that create actions of planning the day, again, my time feels like it has multiplied. My outcomes have changed as a result of changing my thinking.
Just a little side note here, if we constantly talk about feeling overwhelmed and over scheduled, stress and anxiety will set in. Instead try substituting the word expanding for stressed or overwhelmed. Instead of I’m so stressed try my world is expanding. This little shift in thought can be REALLY helpful in figuring out how to deal with what’s happening.
In all of this living on purpose, I’ve gone to a ‘not to do’ list as much as a ‘to do’ list.
This is because if I RESIST certain things during the day, my time is not adversely affected by them…things like social media, notifications on my phone, checking email every 10-15 minutes, or even cleaning the house or THE DISHES…
I know what is most important, and I resist the urge for other tasks until priorities are done.
Avoid resistance of all kinds by having a morning and evening routine in place that supports your priorities. Prep for your morning the evening before - that is your evening ritual. Prep for your evening in the morning when you look at the day, and by having an end of work day process. Unless you are a
Interruptions
Now sometimes interruptions invade that sacred time, or issues at work require diligent attention. Of course, I recommend getting curious. Ask questions!
Ask yourself first and foremost, is it necessary I deal with this right now?
Can it wait 10-15 minutes?
If I give up my time right now, when can I plug back into what’s important?
If it’s a task at work that is going to make you late or unavailable for your family later, is this a requirement or am I telling myself I need to be perfect when no one really expects that from me?
Yes, obstacles and interruptions will invade. I’m offering the idea that creating a day that is centered around priorities, each day, will allow you to put your attention and focus on what is important to you for ( even a little bit of time each day helps). This creates an awareness of what’s important as you begin the day. And I invite you to simply move the priority around when needed. It’s not forgotten.
The plan for the day is not set in stone - it’s flexible and based on what you want or need from time that is yours. The interruptions and obstacles will become less and less as you learn to value your time by using it with intention on what you have decided is important.
I love the idea of defining when or under what circumstances you will allow your time to be taken away.
The idea is that because I know what is important in the first place, I can move those tasks to a different slot. Or I can see why I didn’t make anticipated progress on an action item - because I couldn’t devote my attention and time to the task that day or week. Awareness is key! Planning is key!
Action Steps for Living on Purpose
Start by starting. Define what is important to you.
10 minutes or 60 minutes, carve a little time out for your priorities.
Incorporate a daily ritual when you wake, as you arrive at work, at the end of your day, or at bed time to decide 2-3 action items that are important to you.
Make that not to do list each day and consciously choose where you will and will not spend your time.
Do not discount the importance of sleep, nutrition, relaxation and releasing negativity.
The Guts of The Matter When It Comes to Creating The Day
One last thought that gets down to the guts of the matter. How is your brain doing? If you are like I used to be, my plate was full upon waking. Thinking past getting up was really hard. I made it through each day on autopilot and without assigning any sort of importance to any of my time other than the bare minimum requirement of the day. My serious loss of brain function was due to an inflamed gut. It is beyond belief how our gut affects brain function. I had an overgrowth of microbes that were not serving me.
Over the last two years as I’ve leveled up my microbiome through supplementation and food, I’ve completed a nutrition certification, a mindset certification, taken on coaching clients, built a website, taught my mindset curriculum to a large group and taken adults and kiddos through the platform. I’ve also helped a client rebrand her business and created an entirely new website for her platform. What I can accomplish with my time these days is INCREDIBLE. The before and after is unreal.
The gut health system I found created serious change in my brain function. This podcast is sponsored by that very system. If you can relate and you want to heal your gut and change your life, check out BecomeTheNew.com/gut-health and learn about how to get the system for you. It’s affordable and life changing. If you are not there yet, start by starting with better nutrition. More than anything I encourage you to embrace living life over stumbling through it.
